Terry Prone: My virtual customer service shoots itself in the foot

Originally published in the Irish Examiner.

A couple of years ago I bought sheepskin slippers in Lidl, dirt cheap. Not that I was going to actually wear them, mind you.

Nothing so unglamorous would ever touch feet which have a profound sense of entitlement to 4in stilettos. But I have this wheelie bag containing things I’d never in my right mind put on, but which is a kind of luggage insurance policy against hospitalisation.

If you suddenly end up in hospital, you need a bag with a clean (or new) nightdress for starters because, although you may sleep at home in ratty old T-shirts and panties, that will not do in a bed in Ward 3. Nor will 4in heels.

So when I saw the slippers in Lidl, I believed they were headed for the emergency bag. Trying them on at home and discovering their blissful comfort was a surprise which led to me wearing them often in my home and also when gardening. They went into the washing machine several times and — after drying on the windowsill stuffed with paper towels — came up as good as new.

That was why, when I spotted the exact same dead-ringer slippers in the Lidl catalogue a fortnight ago, I was ecstatic.

Even more so at their price: €17.99. I might, I thought, totally lose the run of myself and buy one brown pair and one black pair.

Bank holiday Monday, when these slippers were going on sale, I fruitlessly searched for them, then asked a man packing the shelves for help. He obligingly slashed open several cartons with a Stanley knife, revealing neatly-stored slippers. Slippers, but not as we wanted them.

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